Toxic Love Playlist

My Mixtape’s A Masterpiece is a weekly feature in which a guest compiles a playlist around some theme. This week, in the shadow of Valentine’s Day, Alexis M. Collazo assembles 13 tracks that highlight the darker side of love. Read Alexis’ thoughts on each song and listen along to the Spotify and YouTube playlists below.

Valentine’s Day just passed and for many people love is still in the air. I’ve never really cared about it myself. It seems more like a convenient tool for manipulation than a celebration of love and romance. It’s often used to prey on the lonely and desperate or justification for selfish and materialistic requests. I’ve seen it bring out the worst in people, maybe that’s not the holiday but just love and human nature at work. Love can be an amazing and precious thing, or it can be toxic and torturous. In honor of that, I’m leaning into my cynical side for a playlist that’s a reminder of just how dangerous love can be.

1. “Love Is A Battlefield” by Pat Benatar

A little something to set the stage. What better image than a battlefield to portray the dangers of love and relationships?

2. “Smooth Operator” by Sade

Often people with the most toxic personalities are always the ones with the smoothest moves. Even when red flags start popping up, they have a way of talking themselves back into your heart, or whatever else they’re really after.

3. “Tainted Love” by Soft Cell

Never have I ever heard a more perfect song about love gone wrong. There’s a reason there are a couple hundred covers of it. While the original (performed by Gloria Jones) is good, it’s a bit too cheery. Soft Cell’s version cuts deeper for me and has stayed my favorite compared to the others I’ve listened to.       

4. “You Could Be Mine” by Guns N’ Roses

Here’s an anthem for toxic boyfriends everywhere. Talk about major gaslighting. Every verse outlines how little he gives a shit about you. But when we get to chorus it’s all about you being the one who’s out of line.

5. “I Wanna Be Your Slave” by Måneskin

In my own experience with a toxic relationship, it’s never one-sided. It’s like a constant game of tug of war for control. But the biggest battles happen inside your own head, trying to figure out where you stand, what you want, or why you stay. Everything about this song feels like that constant push and pull.

6. “Nicotine” by Panic! At The Disco

There’s always one person that no matter how horrible they are for you and how bad they make you feel, you still have a hard time giving them up. As somebody that has also quit smoking I can attest to the similarities.

7. “One Way Or Another” by Blondie

This song gives total stalker vibes. We’ve all conveniently run into that person that doesn’t know how to take the hint that it’s over.

And I can admit to being the crazy ex that walked by his house just because I happened to be in the neighborhood. By the way—don’t do this; it’s not good for anybody involved.

8. “I Hate Everything About You” by Three Days Grace

I think the chorus here is self-explanatory. “I hate everything about you, why do I love you”?

9. “#1 Crush” by Garbage

Romanticized by its place on the soundtrack to Baz Luhrmann’s ROMEO + JULIET, I totally vibed out to this song while daydreaming about my various crushes as a teen. Listening to it as an adult, I realize it’s not about love. It’s much closer to obsession and on the verge of dangerous.  

10. “Eva” by Orgy

This girl totally ghosted. Eva’s that person that disappeared without a word when things seemed like they were just great.  

11. “Fleabag” by Yungblood

There comes a point in “relationshits” where you get tired of the fighting and don’t even bother to defend yourself anymore. You just say fuck it and agree that you are every bit as horrible as they say you are.

12. “I Don’t Care” by Apocalyptica, Adam Gontier

We’re at the end of the line here. When you’ve finally had enough of the drama, fighting and manipulations. They’ll try to keep pulling back, but you have to stay strong to get out for good.

13. “This Will Make You Love Again” by IAMX

Even after the worst relationships, you need a bit time to mourn. You can totally cry your eyes out to this melancholy tune. But it’s also my way to end on a hopeful note. No matter how much you’ve been hurt, you can love again.