LISTMAS—10 Ass-Kicking Holiday Movies And Episodes
The holiday season is upon us once again, meaning it’s time to embrace the greatest gift of all: watching people get punched in the face. Longtime readers of the site will remember last year’s Seasons Beatings, dedicated to all things action and holidays. But even a month-long spectacular could only briefly dive into the world of holiday action movies. So here are ten more action-packed holiday movies and TV shows to get you through the cold winter months. To make it more fun I gave myself a challenge: I can’t talk about any of the movies already discussed on this site, and no Shane Black movies or DIE HARD. So that means, hopefully, these are movies and TV shows that may be a bit more off the path.
Leverage: “The Ho Ho Ho Job” (2010)
Leverage features a team of con-artists and thieves who defend the innocent against corrupt corporations by stealing from them and making the victims whole. Season three’s “The Ho Ho Ho Job” finds Team Leverage hired by a mall Santa who was wrongfully terminated for allegedly drinking on the job. While trying to steal back his job for him, the team discovers Santa’s firing was a set-up for a much bigger con orchestrated by one of their old enemies. The finale of this episode is guaranteed to bring holiday tears to your eyes.
“The Ho Ho Ho Job” and the rest of Leverage is streaming on FreeVee
Buffy The Vampire Slayer: “Amends” (1998)
There’s no holiday episode of any TV show that wrecks me like “Amends.” Taking place during the pivotal season three, the episode finds tortured vampire Angel being haunted by his past sins as the monstrous Angelus. Titular heroine Buffy must fight the First Evil, the source of all the evil in the world, in a battle for Angel’s soul. Buffy The Vampire Slayer was known for often hitting in the feels, but “Amends” crosses over into full blown sentimentality and the episode is the better for it.
“Amends”, and the rest of Buffy The Vampire Slayer is streaming on Hulu and the Roku Channel
RUNNING SCARED (1986)
When you think of action stars, Gregory Hines and Billy Crystal are likely not who you think of, but RUNNING SCARED is a buddy-cop comedy in the grand tradition, and predates even LETHAL WEAPON (1987), the standard bearer for holiday buddy cop films. Hines and Crystal play Chicago detectives trying to bust a drug lord played by Jimmy Smits. The Christmas feels are minimal but the film’s opening establishes that it clearly takes place around the holidays. The real appeal, however, is the chemistry between Hines and Crystal, which feels like a nice glass of eggnog.
RUNNING SCARED is streaming on HBOMax
KARAS: THE PROPHECY and KARAS: THE REVELATION (2005)
KARAS is a six-part anime series that was released as two feature length films. Otoha is a former Yakuza who has been reborn as Karas, the defender of the city. Otoha is tasked with stopping the previous Karas from remaking the city and turning its citizens into monsters. The holiday scenes are pretty few and far between but the opening action scene really brings in the Christmas vibe, and the entire series is a great watch for tokusatsu and anime fans.
Both parts of KARAS are available as a complete collection on DVD
Martial Law: “Sammo Claus” (1999)
Martial Law was a TV series starring Chinese action legend Sammo Hung as a Chinese detective who has relocated to Los Angeles. “Sammo Claus” sees Sammo going undercover as a Santa to track down a gang of armed Santa-clad thieves stealing the season’s hottest toy. “Sammo Claus” mixes the hard-hitting Sammo action the series was known for with a heart-warming B-plot in which Sammo attempts to reunite a kid with his missing brother. The episode features shoot-outs, underground fights, and Sammo beating on people while dressed like Santa. It truly is as kick-ass as the holidays get.
Martial Law is available on DVD
CHRISTMAS CROSSFIRE (2020)
It’s a classic Christmas tale: nerdy professor meets hot girl in a bar, they hook up, fall in love, professor interrupts a murder and has to run, hot girl has to save him. Ok maybe not so classic, but this German crime comedy is a delight. Director Detlev Buck keeps everything breezy despite some serious stakes, and the film makes sure to incorporate some nice holiday spirit. Leads Kostja Ullmann and Alli Neumann have terrific chemistry and both the humor and action are well done. Absolutely an underseen gem.
CHRISTMAS CROSSFIRE is streaming on Netflix
RIOT (1996)
A Christmas movie starring DTV action legend Gary Daniels? It’s a holiday miracle! Daniels stars a British soldier in the US who must rescue an ambassador’s daughter during a city-wide riot on Christmas Eve. Oh, and the daughter happens to be Daniels’ ex-girlfriend. Part of Daniels’ famed “R” trilogy, along with RAGE (1995) and RECOIL (1998), RIOT is everything you could want out of an old-school PM Entertainment movie. Directed by Joseph Mehri, but the real star is second unit director and stunt coordinator Spiro Razatos, who conjures up some amazing practical stunts and set-pieces. There’s a bar fight backed by a hip-hop version of “Joy To The World,” which is as good as Christmas gets.
RIOT is available for rental or purchase on Amazon Prime
BODIES AT REST (2019)
Did you know Renny Harlin made a Christmas action film? No, not that one. No, not that one either. BODIES AT REST is a Chinese movie starring Johnnie To regular Nick Cheung as a medical examiner working on Christmas Eve, when a group of armed assailants break into the morgue to retrieve a piece of evidence. The gang’s leader is played by fellow To regular Richie Jen, and watching Cheung and Jen square off is a treat. Yang Zi is terrific as Cheung’s assistant and the whole film has a nice holiday vibe. Harlin proves that, at least occasionally, he still has it. It’s not THE LONG KISS GOODNIGHT (1996), but it’s still a ton of fun.
BODIES AT REST is not streaming in the US, but the DVD can be found for reasonable prices on Ebay and Amazon.
ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 (2005)
While a remake of John Carpenter's classic seemed destined to go the way of other Carpenter remakes like THE FOG (2005) and THE THING (2011), director Jean-Francois Richet’s update manages to surprise as a tight action thriller with some terrific set pieces. Ethan Hawke, who is always game and committed in genre films, convinces as an action lead, ably bolstered by Lawrence Fishburne as the co-lead. Not a Christmas film, but instead a more rare New Year’s action film. With well shot and designed action, great acting, and Hawke headshotting fools ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 is the perfect way to ring in the new year
ASSAULT ON PRECINCT 13 is available for rental or purchase on all major streaming services
