Soundtrack To The Perfect Neo-Slasher
My Mixtape’s A Masterpiece is a weekly feature in which a guest compiles a playlist around some theme. This week, Sunday Revello assembles 12 tracks to form the soundtrack for her perfect neo-slasher movie. Read Sunday’s thoughts on each song and listen along to the Spotify playlist on top and/or the YouTube playlist at the bottom of the post.
Every horror fan was once a kid with their nose stuck in a copy of Fangoria dreaming of making their own movie someday, right? I have to assume that the answer’s “yes.” As I’ve gotten older, my brain movie has evolved into something a bit more sophisticated than it used to be (but still chock full of sleaze, obviously). I’m not a filmmaker—I don’t have the money, the equipment, the support, or the skill to make my own film, but that doesn’t stop it from playing in my mind when I can’t sleep at night.
I can imagine the sets—elaborately over-decorated interiors with maximalist wall decorations and bright colored furniture that, while popping on its own, would contrast nicely with that bright red ‘70s giallo type blood. Wide, sprawling exteriors in the country where you can feel the isolation and could shoot a film without the neighbors pounding on your door when they hear screams coming from inside the house. I can see my dream cast. I can picture the bright colored lights that accentuate the moods represented in certain scenes, silhouettes backlit by sunsets, and neon-soaked faces. I can hear the perfect soundtrack.
1. “Solo Nobre Must Fall (Theme from Brigador)” by Makeup And Vanity Set
I’m a big fan of The Protomen and when they toured with Makeup And Vanity Set in 2018, I thought I’d check out this other band ahead of time. Turns out they’re right up my alley. This song is from the soundtrack they did for a video game that’s comparable to MechWarrior, but would still be right at home in a horror flick. It’s the perfect song for an opening chase scene. When I hear it I can see it perfectly in my head: A young woman (who reminds me of Jocelin Donahue but isn’t because I’d never be able to afford her) running down a deserted street, the camera keeping time with her as she keeps turning to look over her shoulder to make sure she’s relatively safe, nearly tripping over her feet but never falling because I refuse to have that in my dream movie. The sound of her feet hitting the pavement as she cries fading out as the volume of the song increases until the title smacks you in the face.
2. “Until the Last Drop of Blood” by VHS Glitch
The opening kill is important. You need it to establish the kind of danger your characters are in and to introduce your killer—their costume, maybe a mask, what type of people they’re after, any kind of signature weapon, and just how brutal they are. This song is the perfect soundtrack to that murder. Just like the artist in track 10, VHS Glitch is out there laying down concept albums one after the other, a few of which are horror-themed. They’re pretty vague ideas carried mostly by vibes, but that’s honestly what I’m here for.
3. “Girl in a Varsity Jacket” by Quasars
“Girl in a Varsity Jacket” has that fun, upbeat, poppy sound while still fitting the vibe. Your whole movie can’t just be chase scenes and brutal stabbings, you need to show your characters living their normal lives, even being happy, for the audience to care about them when they die. With this thrown on the soundtrack you could have one of those fun little everyone-goes-to-the-lake-together scenes, two characters falling in love, some of that good friend bonding that makes your heart break when the final girl’s cool best friend dies; something light to break up the bleak bits.
4. “Hunter-Killer” by Kick Puncher
Not every death can be a quick stab in the shadows. What’s the point of a horror flick where a bunch of people are dying if there aren’t any big, cinematic murders? Sometimes, the victim’s going to put up a fight, especially if the killer is your average, everyday human. Give that teenage girl a baseball bat and let her go to town on whoever’s trying to kill her! Does she get to win? No. But that doesn’t mean she can’t go out swinging.
5. “On The Run” by Timecop1983
Despite the name of the song, “On The Run” is perfect for that scene where the characters go into research mode. The one where a group of teens heads to the library to read up on whatever local legend is plaguing their town, whatever ghost is haunting the house one of them recently moved into, whatever it was that traumatized the local boogeyman back when they were a child. I’m such a sucker for people discovering the truth behind whatever’s going on by going through old newspaper articles on microfiche readers. It’s so charming.
6. “As I Try Not To Fall Apart” by White Lies
It can’t all be wild, ‘80s-style synth music. Well, it could, but that’s not my style and what would be the point of a movie being full of all my favorite things if I didn’t include my favorite band? The problem with this is that Ana Lily Amirpour is out there doing God’s work tossing White Lies songs into her movies and absolutely devastating me with it. I can’t top the “Death” scene in A GIRL WALKS HOME ALONE AT NIGHT. No one can. But I’ll be damned if I’m not throwing something feel-good in there for a less horror-filled scene while two people are sitting around in a bedroom chatting or driving in a car with the windows down in the middle of the night.
7. “Phantasm” by Occams Laser
Sometimes the characters don’t put up much of a fight, but still have a great survival instinct. Choosing flight always leads to a great chase scene. Watching a terrified person running down alleys to try to escape their fate only to realize they’ve eventually boxed into a dead end after so many twists and turns and has nowhere left to run is always a good time.
8. “In the 42nd Street” by Absolute Valentine
This song would be good for establishing cinematography. Wide shots, vast darkness, trees dotting the landscape, a barely lit house in the center to really get the sense of isolation. A big lake house with too many rooms, the camera shifting slowly between them, an overhead shot that moves over the walls that tells you this place doesn’t actually have a ceiling. Someone setting up a party in a barn on a farm with no neighbors for miles; the perfect place for a third act bloodbath.
9. “Blood Rage” by Nightcrawler
You know that scene in a movie where the final girl finally gets it together and prepares for battle? Nancy Thompson setting booby traps in A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET, Erin finding weapons and laying traps in YOU’RE NEXT, or the characters in THE FINAL GIRLS preparing for the last act of the film. This is the song I want to hear while I watch the dwindling survivors set traps, build makeshift weapons, and go find a cool leather jacket to put on before a big confrontation with the killer.
10. “Survival Skills” by Mega Drive
This is the one. You need an epic song for the final battle between good and evil, your final girl versus some guy in a mask, your heroine outsmarting a shadowy figure in black leather gloves, your Sidney Prescott kicking Ghostface in the head. Mega Drive made the album Sleeper Street as their own soundtrack to a horror movie that doesn’t exist and, honestly, the whole thing rips. With song titles like “While My Chainsaw Gently Bleeds” and “He’s Inside The House!”, you can imagine the slasher movie they had in mind when you sit and listen to it in its entirety—which is definitely something I encourage. But I figured borrowing a song for my own soundtrack wouldn’t hurt.
11. “In the Face of Evil” by Magic Sword
The sun is rising, the killer is defeated, the final girl has won. As she lets out a deep breath and walks away from the body, a song slowly fades in. She, and anyone else left standing, are bundled into shock blankets as they sit in the open back of an ambulance overlooking the scene—police walking around trying to piece together exactly what’s happened, EMTs wheeling body bags past, townsfolk gathering behind the police tape to see what’s going on. They’re finally safe. At least, until a sequel.
12. “Hourglass” by S U R V I V E
This is perfect end credit music. It’s fairly tame but still has the vibe I’m looking for to pair with my horrendous neo-giallo/slasher abomination. The song doesn’t pick up until about 2 minutes and 15 seconds in and even then, it doesn’t go as over the top as some of my other choices. I think it’s a great song to keep you in the mood you’ve managed to cultivate with the film while helping you wind down a little.
